Chris Colfer and The Complexity of Relationships
by JAJL820
Summary: Crisscolfer series! Chris Colfer has always been confused by the human race. Now he is older and has to deal with people and relationships and he seems to just be drowning, and at the center of all of it is sex...stupid sex. Please leave comments. featuring Chris/Roberto Aguire Darren/Mia. Will be updated once a week!
1. The Party

The Party

He was not a genius, he was not an inspiration, he was not a prodigy, and he sure as hell was not a sex god. He was but a boy from a small conservative town trying to make his dreams come true. He was doing pretty good too; acting-check, writhing-check, producing-check, sex-working on it.

"Hello, you've been staring at them all night! what, is it weird to see your TV lover with someone else?" Lea asked as she pulled her and Cory to the side of the roller rink to better converse with the birthday boy.

"Oh, hey...must be." Chris responded finally tearing his eyes away from Darren and his girlfriend Moira-or something like that.

"This party is the shit, man. Nice job!" Cory slapped his shoulder earning the infamous Colfer glare.

"He didn't do anything, it was all his boyfriend." Lea told him, then turned back to Chris. "You're so lucky, this is the sweetest thing!"

"Yea he's okay sometimes." Lea pulled them back into the sea of pirate-ninja-Colfer friends, only after placing a wet kiss on his cheek.

The party was great, everyone that was important was there, there were drinks, and M&M's, and everything Chris adored but he just couldn't get in the party mood. "Hey I hope you're enjoying this, it's the only present I got you." Roberto came up behind Chris, pressing his chest against his back and slinking his arms around his waist.

"Hey!" He turned quickly not wanting to be caught staring at his 'TV lover' again. "It's awesome! I love it! The best ever!" He said over excitedly, wriggling away from Roberto's arms.

"Good I'm glad you're having fun." He smiled paying no head to Chris' struggles, he was never really the affectionate type.

"I want to skate."

"Oh."

"With you!"

"Oh! Yay!"

The night became fun, Chris kept away from Darren and Martha-or whatever. He was on a fabulous buzz thanks to the rum and coke and tequila shots, all worries were in the shadows and happiness was at the forefront of his mind. He was so content in fact that he kissed Roberto three times in front of everyone. Now it was nearing four in the morning and Chris had said good buy to over half of all his guests and was on his way to another delicious shot when he spotted a curly-haired pirate.

"Hey Birthday boy." Said pirate greeted.

"Oh my god, cause I forgot." Chris drunkenly stuttered.

"You forgot about me?" Darren pouted.

"No, you were just lurking in the shadows or my mind."

"Well just to tell you, I like the sun." He smiled.

"Oh, well forget about that for a sec. and come to the shadows." Chris took his hand and pulled him into the small deserted hallway leading to the changing rooms.

"Should I be scared?" Darren said but followed willingly.

"I don't think so. Did you having fun?"

"You have awful grammar when you're drunk." He said endearingly. "Of course, I did and am. Although I could have used more of you, I felt like you were avoiding me."

"No, not you. I'm sorry." Chris threw his arms around Darren's neck and gave him an Eskimo kiss.

"S'alright." He chuckled, settling into the hug.

"I don't like your girlfriend."

"Mia? she's a sweetheart."

"She's obnoxious, and she thinks shes sooooo much more different than she is."

"What does that even mean?"

"You know those girls who say they aren't like normal girls because they have blue hair or swear a lot, or drink beer."

"You totally just described her." Darren's laugh showed Chris he knew exactly what he meant. "Are you sure you don't just like me?"

"Yes!" He bit defensively, but tightened his grip on Darren.

"Christopher! Everyone is leaving, boy! Time to hit the road!" Ashley yelled too loud interrupting them by stepping into the hall. "And you're already saying good bye, I'll be out front." The way her voice changed when she seen them, and her brisk walk away made Chris feel as if he were doing something wrong, causing him to retract his arms from the other man immediatly.

"Sorry." He said not knowing why.

"Don't be." They said a quick friendly good bye and were about to go their separate ways when Darren suddenly pulled Chris back by his forearm. "Umm...just to tell you...I don't like your boyfriend, Ralph-or whatever."

This made Chris' chest fill with explosive rainbows of delight, which frightened him immensely.


	2. The Morning After

The Morning After

"My head is going to explode." Chris sobbed into his hands. This had to be the worst hangover he had ever had in his life. The one memory he had of his birthday night was everyone arriving kissing his boyfriend in front of everyone (embarrassing as hell) and his awkward conversation with Darren.

"Yea last night was deff a success." Ashley laughed taking a seat at the table they'd been assigned to by their waitress at the hotel breakfast bar.

"I wore short-shorts." He frowned.

"Yes, you did." She handed him four Advil tablets.

"Why?"

"You tell me."

"To be sexy. Did he think I was sexy?"

"Roberto or Darren?" Ashley asked with knowing eyes.

"I don't like you."

"Chris, you have a boyfriend who could be in love with you, if you don't feel the same end it now."

"He's great and Darren is straight, so..." He really didn't even know what point he was trying to make,but he did know that he did not want to talk about this.

"Do you like him?"

"Who?"

"Both I guess."

"Yea, I adore Roberto. He's funny, smart, cute...Darren is just romanticized. Ash, I think I have a crush on Blaine Anderson." She laughed at this but they both knew Chris was avoiding.

"So Roberto, he's gonna be around for a while?"

"Yea, maybe even longer."

"Ooo, so this is real!" She clapped her hands together a little mockingly. "Have you two done the nasty yet?"

"Ashley!" Chris' face went red immediately, as it always did at the mention of himself and intimacy. "Eat your pancakes!"

"Oh come on, I've been sooo good. I wanted to ask you ages ago!"

"Well the answer is no." He said quietly.

"Okay." They ate in silence till Chris spoke again.

"I just...I don't really like being touched, and _that_ is all about touching. It just...it's just going to take me a while to get there. I'm weird aren't I?"

"No! I Know you have intimacy issues. Listen, you're 22 years old, I was a virgin at 22."

"You're a girl, it's different."

"Yes, and it's different for everyone. Don't rush things just to get rid of your v-card, it's really not that big of a deal Christopher. Be proud you're not a slut."

"Can I be a little slutty?"

"No."

"Trampy?"

"Eat your omelet!"


	3. V-Card

Hey! Thank you guys soooo much for reading! Please, let me know what you think; what you like, what you don't, if you want something to happen, ect. I will update sometime next week. I hope my little story can help with the notorious 4th episode (I will not say anything more about it!) Hope you enjoy :)

V-Card

It was a lazy Sunday, Chris' favorite kind. He loved these days because he could do nothing and for some reason not feel guilty about it. So there he was enjoying the delicious dinner his equally delicious boyfriend had made for him.

"Mmmm, the steak was all bloody. Just the way I like it, thank you." He smiled, dropping his plate in the sink.

"Well I am delighted that you liked it, cutie." Roberto brought his plate to the sink and placed his left hand on Chris' right hip. "Maybe you can give me some dessert."

"Yea, sure. I have some cookies me and Ash made..." Chris made to look in the fridge, but was held back as another hand settled on his left hip.

"No, no cookies." Roberto nuzzled his face into Chris' Neck, placing kisses up his throat. "Christopher cookies."

This was okay, Chris could deal with this. He actually quite liked making out, even thrusting together, even hand jobs. This, he could do. What he couldn't do was the small stuff, the caressing, the sweet nothings, the small moans, the sex. He had to be in control of his emotions at all times. Last time Roberto tried to go down on him, Chris had thrown himself into a panic attack before anything really happened.

"Okay."

"No!" Roberto grabbed the hand that was shoved down his pants. "Don't look so bored, Jesus. I want to touch you too." Chris nodded taking Roberto's hand and shoving it down his own pants. "No!" Roberto snatched his hand back. "A little romance would be appreciated please. Lets go to your room."

"Umm..."

"We don't have to take any clothes off, okay?"

"Yea." Chris walked to his room, assuming Roberto would follow.

Chris was very apprehensive at his boyfriends instruction to lay back on the bed, but eventually complied. He was soon covered by the other boy, and his lips were sucked into a passionate kiss, that Chris manipulated into becoming heated, fearing intimacy. They were thrusting against each other, shirts coming unbuttoned (which Chris had just recently allowed, not liking the vulnerability of being half naked ) Roberto's hand snaked down his pants. Chris was close when he felt a hot tongue against his prick, he took a deep breath trying to just go with it. This was not the last of it however, the tongue traveled up to his ass, pushing its way inside.

"What the fuck!" Chris sat up pushing the other away.

"What?"

"What do you think you're doing?" He stood buttoning his shirt and pants.

"You, Chris! God when are you going to give in and just fucking have sex with me!" He followed suit.

"I'm...I'm not ready!" He could feel his face turn beat red. "If that's not okay, then fuck off!"

"No! Listen, Chris It's fine! I just wanted to show you how good it can be." He reached for his hand but Chris jerked away.

"It's okay, just...go home, I'll talk to you tomorrow."

Roberto left in silence, now Chris was alone with his thoughts. Roberto was a good boyfriend, He knew that Roberto would do anything for him. Yes, maybe he deserved the almighty v-card, but no matter how many times Chris thought about giving it up to him, he just couldn't picture it. This could not be a good sign.


	4. One Night in DC

Hey, guys! So thanks soooooo much for reading, I really hope you're all enjoying! Let me know with reviews and such.:)

One Night In D.C.

Dance rehearsal had been normal, some had busted on Chris for his drunkenness but everything went fine. He and Darren were joking as they did, not a trace of their awkward conversation was left.

"Where are you off to?" Darren asked him as they walked to their cars together.

"Home I guess, although I'd rather be anywhere else."

"Uh oh, trouble in paradise?"

"Yea, just a fight last night, nothing huge."

"Same here." Chris shot him an amused look.

"You and Matilda! I'm shocked."

"Yea, I guess we're not perfect after all." They had made it to their cars (conveniently next to each other). "Want to disappeared for a while?"

"Hmm?"

"With me. Come on, I'll drive you back later for your car."

"Wait, I'll drive." Darren rolled his eyes.

"Chris, no! you are such a control freak, get in the god damn car."

Darren drove them to a small pub (totally Darren). They sat at the bar, which was rather noisy causing them to move closer to hear one another. Chris couldn't help but feel as if he were on a date, Darren was being a perfect gentleman and Chris was being a sarcastic ball of giggles. He was not used to this Darren, he wasn't his goofy self. This Darren was refined, polite, protective, and extremely sweet.

"I think I have you figured out actually." Chris said once their dignified conversations went dry.

"Oh?"

"You're a serial killer."

"What?" A glimpse of real Darren showed.

"You're acting strange, and oddly calm. You're acting as if you do this all the time...and you were quite adamant that I didn't take my car..."

"You got me." Darren laughed with a pretty severe blush, but Darren never blushed. "I'm sorry, am I weird."

"Well why are you acting like this?" He asked with only curiosity in his voice.

"I dunno, I guess most of the time I'm here I'm in boyfriend mode not crazy friend mode." There was a thick pause. "I-I don't really know how to act with you, Chris."

He ignored the part of his brain that wanted analyze every word the boy had just said because it was too scary to think of it. If he thought of it he would stop being Chris and become boyfriend Chris, just as Darren had (although boyfriend Chris is different, all he does is stare at the floor and make rude comments now and again).

"Well just be DC, I like him." They exchanged smiles.

The pub turned out to be really fun, they talked and danced and talked. The best part was that they could be totally and completely themselves. Chris learned that Darren is extremely close to his family and that if he had it his way would still be living with them, that he had to stop the car once because he hit a raccoon and tears were fogging his vision, and interestingly he learned that he thought Chris was gorgeous. He also allowed Darren to know Roberto was his first boyfriend, that he didn't ever really get along with his parents, and that he doesn't like to be touched.

"This was so fun! Thanks man, I needed it." Darren said as they got into his car.

"Yeah, now home...bleh."

"Mmm, I don't want to go either." It was quiet for about three whole minutes before Darren spoke again. "Hey, I have an idea."

"Hmm?"

"Why don't we have a slumber party."

"No, I hate your girlfriend."

"No, I'll get us a hotel room."

"So now I'm a cheap slut." Chris smiled, and Darren laughed.

"No, I'm a classy dude. You're a top grade slut."

They ended up in a one bed hotel room (neither of them said anything when Darren said one bed to the check in desk). they hooked up Darren's iPhone to the television and watched old Nickelodeon shows on Netflix.

"Is it sad how well I can relate to Helga. I mean the way she acts with Arnold is the way I act with anyone I like."

"You're nice to me."

"Not really."

"No?"

"Not in my head."

"So you're opposite Helga? You are nice to their face and mean in your private passionate monologues."

"Yeah." It was silent before Chris hit Darren in the middle of the forehead. "Who said I like you, fuckwad!" They laughed hysterically.

"You're worse than Helga! Jesus!"

Darren fell asleep facing Chris, they were in close proximity, and he could help but find it reminiscent of _The First Time_. He had the same butterflies in his stomach that Kurt did, and they weren't even doing...that. Maybe this is why he couldn't come to give himself to Robert, because he always had to to keep up a facade; that is a quite difficult job during sex. You cannot hold back your emotion when you're having sex, you're vulnerable and out there. Maybe he just needed someone like Darren to lose it to. The problem was that there was no one like Darren, except well Darren.


End file.
